My Quiet Struggle to Financially Sustain My God-Given Business
There were months when a few thousand dollars would come into my business, and within a week, it was gone. I would look at the account and be back at $0. Not because I had spent it on some extravagant lifestyle. There were business expenses that needed to be paid. There were personal expenses. I contributed toward groceries and other household needs. And because my business was my sole source of personal income, when money came in, it had a lot of places to go. Then there were the months when nothing came in at all. That was the part that made things difficult. A business bill would be coming due for the next month, and I might look at the account and know there wasn’t enough there to cover it. Sometimes the answer was simply to wait and trust that something would come in. And eventually, something usually did.
My husband was also part of the picture. I wasn’t carrying our household by myself. He continued to handle the backend of our household finances and made sure our primary household bills were paid. But my business income still mattered. I was contributing to our household in the ways I could, while also trying to keep the business operating. For a long time, this was my normal. I was building a business I believed God had given me, but I was also learning how to live with an income that wasn’t always predictable.
There was one year that really brought this home for me. When I went to file my taxes, I discovered that the business had actually generated almost $20,000 that year. Almost $20,000. But I remember sitting in the tax office and knowing that the account was at $0. That moment stayed with me. The business had generated money. I had worked. The revenue was there. But I didn’t have money sitting in the account that I could point to and say, “This is what the business has built.” That was another part of my stewardship lesson. It wasn’t enough for money to come in. I needed to learn how to manage what came in so that the business could actually retain some of it, prepare for what was coming next, and have something available when expenses came due. I was learning that generating income and building financially are not necessarily the same thing. And that distinction was important for me to understand.
I think this is important to say because sometimes, when we know God has given us a business and our primary focus is the purpose behind it and the Kingdom mission we’re trying to fulfill, we can become so focused on the mission that we don’t give enough attention to the financial side of the business. But the truth is, a Kingdom-minded business still needs finances. The purpose doesn’t eliminate the expenses. The mission doesn’t eliminate the bills. The vision doesn’t eliminate the need for revenue. There is still an internet bill. There is still a phone bill. There are programs and subscriptions the business needs in order to operate. There are publishing expenses. There are people who need to be paid for the work they do. There are costs that come with maintaining a website and keeping the business moving. None of those things make the mission less spiritual.
I had to learn that there is nothing unspiritual about wanting the business to generate enough money to operate well, pay what it owes, invest in the people who help make the work possible, and have something left over to continue building. For me, learning that didn’t take away from the purpose of the business. It helped me understand that stewardship is part of the purpose too.
There were people who might look at that and say, That was reckless. Someone else might ask, Why didn’t you just get another job? And honestly, I did try. I filled out applications. I looked for other opportunities. But I never received a response from some of the places I applied. In other situations, I was overqualified. And there were times when I genuinely believed God was closing the door because He wanted me to continue trusting Him with the business.
But this isn’t a story about proving that every decision I made was right. It’s a story about what God began teaching me while I was making those decisions. Because somewhere along the way, I realized that I could believe God gave me the business and still have something to learn about how to steward it.
There were also times when I prayed that God would simply take the business to another level financially. I wanted to wake up one day and see that there was finally enough coming in—not just enough to pay the business expenses, but enough to have something left over. Enough to breathe. Enough to plan ahead. Enough that I wasn’t constantly wondering when the next payment would come. I wanted the business to generate enough that I could cover what it needed and still have money remaining. And I don’t think there was anything wrong with wanting that. I wanted the business to grow. I wanted to be able to build financially. I wanted to experience some consistency.
But I eventually realized that I was asking God for more while He was also teaching me how to handle what I already had. I kept thinking about the Scripture in Luke 16:10 about being faithful in what is least and being faithful in much. I wasn’t taking that to mean that if I managed my money perfectly, God would automatically give me more. I don’t believe Scripture gives us a formula like that. But personally, the verse made me ask myself a difficult question: If I was asking God to increase what was coming into the business, was I also becoming the kind of steward who could responsibly handle an increase? That question stayed with me.
I wanted more. I wanted the business to generate enough to cover its expenses and still have money left over. I wanted to be able to breathe financially instead of watching everything come in and go right back out. But I began to realize that perhaps part of my preparation for more wasn’t simply waiting for more to arrive. It was learning what to do with what I already had.
I prayed about it. A lot. I asked God to give me discipline. I asked Him to teach me how to steward the money well. I asked Him to help me build financially instead of constantly finding myself back at zero. I wanted wisdom. But if I’m being completely honest, there were times when I wanted God to just give it to me. I wanted to wake up one morning and suddenly know how to manage everything differently. I wanted the discipline to simply be there. I wanted the wisdom to feel automatic.
I had to learn that God gives us free will. He isn’t going to override our will and make our choices for us. He can lead us. He can teach us. He can convict us. He can give us wisdom. But we still have to respond. I could pray for discipline, but I had to practice discipline. I could pray for wisdom, but I had to be willing to learn. I could ask God to help me steward the business, but I also had to do the work.
And that realization changed something in me. I began to understand that maybe the answer to some of my prayers wasn’t going to be God suddenly making me different overnight. Maybe part of the answer was God teaching me, and then giving me the responsibility to apply what He was teaching me. I had been asking God to help me build. He was also teaching me how to steward what I was building.
And I think that’s something many of us can relate to. We can be strong in one area and still need God’s grace in another. We can have faith and still need wisdom. We can be obedient in one area and still have growing to do in another. We can know that God has called us to something and still have to learn how to handle what comes with that calling.
For me, that lesson came through money. It came through looking at an account that had thousands of dollars in it one week and nothing in it the next. It came through praying for provision while realizing I also needed discipline. And it came through learning that stewardship isn’t something I can simply pray for and expect to appear overnight. I have to participate in what God is teaching me. I have to do the work. And I thank God for His grace because I didn’t know then what I know now.
What would you tell another business owner?
What advice would you give to someone who knows God has given them a business, but is quietly struggling to financially sustain it? Maybe they’re passionate about the mission. Maybe they’re trusting God for provision. Maybe they’re bringing in money, but it seems to disappear as quickly as it comes. Maybe they’re trying to figure out how to build financially while still honoring the purpose God gave them. What would you tell them?
Today’s Purpose Woman wants to hear from you in the comments. Your experience, wisdom, or lesson may be exactly what another business owner needs to hear.
Story submitted to Today’s Purpose Woman.
