Denise and Oliver: The Relationship Coaches Who Overcame Challenges to Build an Inspiring Love Story
On a calm Monday afternoon, I found myself on the phone with a couple who exuded an aura that permeated the distance between us despite being miles away from the Today’s Purpose Woman office. Denise and Oliver, a married pair passionate about relationships, spoke to me in a captivating and revealing manner. They shared their journey with humor, openness, and a strong grounding in realism, inviting me into their world and showing me the path they’ve taken to become who they are today.
Denise introduced herself first; the warmth in her voice was tangible, even through the phone line. “I am a wife and mother and grandmother and just very passionate about relationships, helping relationships to grow,” she said with a gentle laugh. This infectious joy seemed to radiate through the line.
Oliver, on the other end of the line, chimed in, “I am the opposite of what she is. I’m a husband and father and grandfather.” A former IT professional, he transitioned into the relationship coaching space driven by the shared passion he and Denise had to see relationships thrive.
Denise and Oliver have found a way to combine their experiences and wisdom to impact others positively. As authors, speakers, and coaches, they share their journey with the world, using their transparency and humor to resonate with their audience. Their work is centered around three pillars: extraordinary communication, effective conflict management, and holistic intimacy building.
Their story started in college, where they met through a campus choir. Denise, a single mother at the time, had daughters who met Oliver before she did. The shared laughter over their initial impressions of each other and their playful banter about who was interested in whom first painted a vivid picture of the strong bond they share.
When asked about the moment they knew they would end up as husband and wife, Denise pointed out that Oliver realized it before she did. “I think that you babe realized it before I did,” she said, with a hint of amusement in her voice. This realization led to a whirlwind of events that saw them married within a few months of Oliver’s pseudo-proposal over the phone.
Oliver recalls, “I proposed over the phone from Maryland while she was in Michigan. This happened in June, shortly after I had returned home in May. After the proposal, I packed up and went straight back to Michigan in July.” Denise adds, “And then we got married in September.”
Their relationship, like any other, has not been without its fair share of challenges. The first year and a half was especially difficult for them. Oliver admits that his way of thinking did not change after getting married, and this caused problems. He recalls doing everything he used to do before they got married, even after tying the knot. “Obviously, that’s not sustainable,” Oliver says. He eventually had an epiphany that made him realize the error of his ways. This led him on a journey of self-discovery, unlearning, and relearning.
When asked how they see God’s hand in their love story, both Denise and Oliver agreed that their union was a saving grace. Their faith was instrumental in navigating their challenges, and they seek to glorify God through their relationship and demonstrate His love to others.
The story that resonated most with their clients is one they faced as a family. Their son’s emotional struggles and the toll it took on their marriage tested their bond. But the experience taught them the importance of communication and teamwork, lessons they now share with the couples they coach.
When asked about what they admire in each other, Denise spoke about Oliver’s integrity and strength, while Oliver described Denise as a woman who treated him better than he felt he deserved – a sentiment that inspired him to strive to be a better man.
The couple’s journey from meeting in college to becoming relationship coaches is a testament to their resilience and the strength of their bond. Their coaching company, Denoli LLC, is dedicated to helping other couples navigate their relationships. The couple takes a personalized approach to their coaching, using assessments and tailored strategies to address specific growth areas in each couple’s relationship.
The couple’s faith plays a significant role in their work. Oliver emphasized the importance of applying the teachings in the Bible to enhance relationships. “Just be willing to start there,” he advised.
Reflecting on their journey, Denise and Oliver shared their books’ titles, hoping to reach more people with their message of love, commitment, and resilience. Oliver’s book, “Overcoming the Man Laws,” is a guide for men, while Denise’s “Dear Single Mom” is a journal and planner for single mothers. Together, they also have a couples’ journal called “Have a Conversation.”
Their story is a testament to the power of love, faith, and commitment. From their initial meeting to their journey as a married couple and now as relationship coaches, Denise and Oliver are an example of how love can not only transform lives but also inspire others to build and maintain their dream relationships. Their story serves as a beacon of hope and a source of inspiration, proving that with love, resilience, and faith, anything is possible.
