Dr. Ebonee Gresham : ‘It’s Bigger Than Me’
It was a Wednesday evening, the twilight hours gently stretching their shadows across the face of time. I was on the line, the conference line to be precise, eagerly anticipating the conversation I was about to have with this Force of Change. The gentle hum of the phone line was soon broken by a voice that carried an unmistakable aura of power and passion. It was Dr. Ebonee Gresham, a woman of faith who had stared adversity in the face but emerged victorious by the divine grace of God. Her voice doesn’t merely convey words; it tells stories of everything she represents – faith, passion, power, determination, and the grit of a lifetime spent building, healing, and nurturing.
Despite the hurdles – motherhood at the age of 16, homelessness while being a single mother to six children, and personal tragedies – Dr. Ebonee eventually emerged triumphant. But victory did not make her complacent. This Buffalo native, now nestled in Lawrenceville, Georgia, has a relentless drive to make a difference. She is a serial entrepreneur, author, healer, wife, and mother of ten children, and I was curious to know what drives her actions.
“What inspired you to become the force of change you are today?” I asked. This simple question led to profound insights. She spoke of her journey as part of a bigger realm and shared mission, gradually realizing her power – the unique story she could tell and the impact it could have on others. “When I reflect on my life, all the trials and tribulations I’ve faced, I realize that it was not just about me. It was bigger than that,” she says, her voice filled with conviction. “I saw women sharing their stories. They stood on the podium and spoke enthusiastically, and I thought, “I can do this.” Dr. Ebonee educated herself about harnessing this narrative force, wielding the power of her story not as a weapon but as an effective beacon of change and resilience.
In essence, Dr. Ebonee was not just going through life; she was growing through it, and that growth wouldn’t be bottled up and kept stagnant. She knew the taste of despair, of seemingly insurmountable challenges. But she also knew the joy of overcoming those challenges. She seemed to view life as an echo of a mantra she held dear – “It is bigger than me.”
“Talking of transformative moments, one powerful moment was completely etched in my memories,” Dr. Ebonee reminisces. “I’ll never forget attending a conference where Dr. Della Toro was making a presentation. His words were a clarion call that sparked something inside me.” As she describes it, something about Dr. Toro’s passionate speech resonated with her. “He was emphasizing the uniqueness of each individual.
‘You are the change agent; decide what makes you different from everybody else. It’s something about you that makes you different,’ he expounded. ‘That’s what sets you apart. There are a lot of hurt people out there, and you’re like their Tylenol. The longer you sit on the sidelines, the more they continue to hurt, and you could be the cure they need.”
The impact of these words was profound. Dr. Ebonee tells us how they reverberated through her soul. “It resonated with me, a life-changing moment where I said, ‘no more.’ Those words empowered me to leverage what I had gone through to give voice to the power within my story.” She continues, “That was my turning point; from that moment, I was determined to share my story, and that set me off on the path I am on today.”
Dr. Ebonee’s journey was one of resilience, faith, and a relentless drive to make a difference. She attributes her success to two core values: keeping God first and staying authentic. Even in the darkest times, she always sought divine support, maintaining a humble spirit and drawing strength from her faith. With unwavering conviction, she shared, “Even when I was on the floor, stricken by postpartum depression, my prayer to God was, ‘When I get there, because I trust you that I will, please keep me humble enough to remember that Ebonee who was once on that floor.’”
This unshakable spirituality has been instrumental in her journey. She says, “Being authentic, being true, being genuine, and showing people true care and supportive spirit. I try to maintain that kindred spirit where I’ll give people the shirt off my back, the last dollar in my pocket. I did it when I didn’t have much. God has given me more now, and so I continue to do it.”
Striking a balance between personal life and creating change can be tricky. However, for Dr. Ebonee, preventing burnout and maintaining motivation boiled down to two simple principles: self-care and mental health. As a nurse, she emphasizes the significance of mental health in managing the myriad responsibilities in her life. She recalls, “Spending time alone helped me restore and pour back into myself. Having to pour into so many others, I need to be a full cup.”
Every change-maker faces obstacles, and for Dr. Ebonee, embracing her past and leveraging it to empower others served as a shield from criticism. She battled check fraud charges, serving jail time, but never let it define her. Instead, she used it to fuel her fight for change. “God has already forgiven me. There’s no condemnation for anything I have done,” she added, her voice swollen with emotion. “When people bring it up, it motivates me to keep going.”
Talking about her mission, you can hear her passion. She painted a vivid picture of her legacy – to break the cycle of shame and silence among women, especially those from black and brown communities. Her vision? For these women to understand their value, harness the power within themselves, and then radiate that power together in unity-bringing sisterhood back into the limelight.
Dr. Ebonee wrapped up our conversation with a message that could have been straight out of one of her powerful speeches. It was the kind of message that sticks with you, undeniably striking and relentlessly hopeful. She said with a look of undying perseverance, “Even in your darkest hours or lowest point of your life, keep going. Find that network or support system that knows and understands that there are clear skies on the other side and keep pursuing them. Just keep going.”
Her ability to reshape adversity into a beacon of hope for others is remarkable. She has emerged from the ashes of her past as a phoenix and a beacon of light, lighting the path for others. As we ended the call, I couldn’t help but think – Dr. Ebonee Gresham is truly a force of change.
This article appears in the Summer 2024 issue of TODAY’S PURPOSE WOMAN.